Spinning My Wheels

February 27th, 2008
I’ve been fuming at myself lately because I’d rather lie in bed with a book or a bag of Tostitos than exercise, so yesterday I took the first spinning class of my life at noon and then worked out with a trainer last night. I’m a 0 to 60 kind of woman–cram all the exercise into one day and then eat like a pig the other six. As I whimpered my way into bed last night, I wondered why I felt exhausted instead energized, worn out instead of woman-hear-me-roar. When my ass felt like it had been grinding on broken glass for 40 minutes at noon, wasn’t that a message that it might not want to do 75 (yes, 75) squats that night? I’m glad to have done it (in the same way that someone might be glad to survive serial root canals), but if my feet hadn’t been locked in those pedal cages and people I knew watching, I’m not sure I wouldn’t have slithered out of the class on my belly. I’m trying to find the silver lining (if only it had been a sheepskin lining) to spinning class in the form of metaphors/messages for my life. Maybe it means I’m pedaling furiously and getting nowhere–wake up, girl!. Or maybe it means my coworkers consider me a pain in the ass–right back at you! Or maybe I’m trying to find my way toward the meaning of life only to find it involves an earsplitting Led Zeppelin soundtrack and hemorrhoids. And of course, Negative Me whispers that Satan invented stationary bikes to see if we can stand up to hell (and pedal while we’re doing it). Next week, I will go back into the dark unknown to test myself once again on the Cosmic Bike. But this time I will bring a sheepskin seat cover.

One Response to “Spinning My Wheels”

  1. Mayberry Magpie says:

    Oh, for the love of all that is holy, Nikki — I so get the “0 to 60” mindset. I will sit on my butt for months on end, then burst out of my house and run five miles. Then stay in bed two days taking Advil to recover.

    And I think you’re right about hell. I once rode 30 miles on a bike without a sheepskin cover, and Satan laughed the whole way. He’s still laughing 15 years later because my “womanhood” will never be the same.

    Mayberry Magpie