Whan that Aprille..

April 20th, 2008
…with his shoures soote
The droghte of march hath perced to the roote,
And bathed every veyne in swich licour
Of which vertu engendred is the flour;
Whan zephirus eek with his sweete breeth
Inspired hath in every holt and heeth
Tendre croppes, and the yonge sonne
Hath in the ram his halve cours yronne,
And smale foweles maken melodye,
That slepen al the nyght with open ye
(so priketh hem nature in hir corages);
Thanne longen folk to goon on pilgrimages…
I love the rhythms and the word picture painted by the prologue to the Canterbury Tales, and I wish I weren’t too lazy to be a pilgrim. I don’t want to join a church or go to potluck dinners or recite the Nicene Creed. I don’t want to elect someone President based on their faith and values and I don’t want to listen to Christian rock and I don’t want to get drafted into anyone’s holy war. I don’t think God is on my side because I’m an American and I wonder about someone who is the only survivor of some catastrophe and says it was because God was watching over them. Why wasn’t he watching over the people who died? It’s never made sense to me. I just want to find that still center that T.S. Eliot wrote about. But still I hang up Tibetan prayer flags and replace them as they wear out and absolutely believe that the wind blows through them and carries blessings near and far. I was raised as a Methodist in Kentucky, became an Episcopalian in the 70s, dropped out of church, went back to church, starting getting pissed off in church, and finally just quit church. Now I wander without direction … no guru, no god, no Good Book, just some fragile hopes.

2 Responses to “Whan that Aprille..”

  1. Anonymous says:

    I just wanted to say that I love reading your blogs. Everyday as I start to type in the website I wonder what great thoughts you will have today. I understand how you feel about religion. I have an aunt, grandmother, and cousin that is very judgy. I told them one time that I was stressed about something and all hell broke loose. They told me that I need Jesus and blah blah blah. Sad to say this about my family but it is people like them that make me not want to go to church. I respect everyone for whoever they are (color, race, sexuality, beliefs, non-beliefs, etc). I feel that if you treat me good then I will do the same. As long as people are happy, who cares what they believe in. Everyone gets stressed once in a while, even Christians! Keep on being the person you are. You are such an inspiration. Thank you!

  2. Mayberry Magpie says:

    I keep coming back and back, feeling the connections of a kindred spirit. You words, today, though blew me away . . . could have been written about me. I, too, grew up Methodist (in Oklahoma, not that different from Kentucky), then went through all the same stages and feel I’ve ended up exactly where you are — wandering with some fragile hopes. I don’t think it’s a bad thing even though everyone around me wants to tell me it is. Everyone wants to tell me how narrow God is, when I think he’s (she’s, we) the most expansive thing that ever could be.